Is this happening to you? Someone you know?
“Your father is dangerous, you can't trust him”
“Your mother is selfish, she only cares about herself”
Parental alienation is a heartbreaking truth of some divorces.
Parental alienation is when one parent actively poisons parent-child relationship with the other parent to punishment their ex-spouse.
The child, who becomes a caretaker for the more vulnerable parent’s feelings, sides with the alienating parent, to keep the peace and to avoid upseting the more vulnerable parent.
The alienating process may start years before the divorce, when one parent actively creates emotional dependence on the children—relying on the child as emotional support—while actively turning the children away from the other parent.
How does this happen? It happens by:
—Badmouthing the other parent (“that’s all your father got your for your birthday? He’s so cheap”; “your mother is so crazy, she should be in a hospital”)
—Intentionally sharing adult information that is not appropriate for children (“your mother is a drunk;” “your father cheated on me our whole marriage”)
—Withholding parenting time, preventing phone calls, or withholding information from the other parent
All children deserve to have an open, loving relationship with both parents—regardless of how contentious the divorce—regardless of how bad the relationship between the adults.
Is parental alienation happening to you, or someone you know? Does this sound familiar? If this is happening to you, it can be heartbreaking. I know.
I can help. I work with divorced parents to reconnect with their children based on openness, trust, security and safety. I help parents reconnect when the relationship has been damaged. It isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.
I’ve been divorced, and I know how challenging these issues can be. But there is hope.
